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So I was sitting listening to some Duran Duran
as I typed up that which you are hearing now. What was most unusual
about the whole thing was that I was wearing clothing. Normally, I
wouldn’t, but since I figured I had to deliver these minutes wearing
something, I ought to write them wearing something. Just in case
you were living in a cave the last few weeks or you were sending a
body double out into the world for you so you could hide beneath
your covers and listen to ABBA, the person to my left is Mr. Robert
Vasher Wesley, better known to all of us as “Mr. Blue”. To his left
is Mr. Smith, who can be “Mr. Blonde”. And, I being to the right of
both of them, only in position, not political affiliation, I guess I
can be “Mr. Red,” just ‘cause I wrote these minutes and I get to
pick colors.
I thought I’d be really funny in these minutes
and allow you guys to laugh a bit as this is the first meeting
back. However, we all know my sense of humor revolves around making
sure I get to laugh, and not you guys. So HA!
So anyways, the last meeting of last semester
was on December 5th, which was Strom Thurmond’s bday. As
a result, a few thoughtful members of the society baked him cakes
and what not. We all thought it was nice, and of course, he greatly
appreciated it. Mr. Gallagher’s jabs at me were quite welcome as he
was one of only a few people who bothered to go to the last play
despite the fact that I announced here in the upper chamber. But
no, I’m not bitter at all…
So here we go….
No one knows who said this, but apparently we
as a bench don’t reflect manliness. But how can we compare to the
bench Ms. Winchell led last semester.
We had two first time guests and no returning
guests or alumni. I think they were all turned off because we were
celebrating Strom’s bday.
In committee reports, Mr. Lerner said that for
the big 200th, we’ll have a few great speakers, including
Mayor Davison and Jeb Bush’s speechwriter.
In programs, we bid a fond adieu to Ms.
Graham, who I was going to make fun of, but I’m afraid of being
stabbed with her fencing sword. She will be missed (if she ever
leaves). There was no old business. We had special elections at
some weird point in the meeting. Mr.’s Miller and Lerner are now
helping Ms. Ballou pick out debate team, so we can of course blame
them if we don’t beat the folks from across the way for the forth
time in a row. This of course means that both gentlemen are on the
judicial council.
Mr. Lewis then gave the following resolution:
“The United States
should NOT pursue more fuel efficiency in its vehicles. Res sub
Todd Lewis.”
He said that buying less oil wouldn’t actually
help our situation in the Middle East, so why should we mess with
our efficiency.
Mr. Gallagher got up and said that Mr. Lewis’
economics were wrong (since of course we all knew what they were
talking about) and that his resolution is senseless
Ms. Copley was in support of the resolution and
felt that oil is a dispensable. We should simply attempt to work it
out so that we as a world are one nation.
Mr. Addison got up and spouted something about
the government telling us what to do and how it was bad.
Ms. Aaron said the resolution was wrong and
that finding a way to protect the economy versus protectin’
resources was a bad idea. We should streamline our production
Mr. Moulds said that Saudi Arabia helps
terrorists and that the princes make money too. He went on to say
that the Mob controls Russia and that Venezuela is a mess because of
it’s leadership. We shouldn’t stop looking for efficient means
because transportation is the most important thing.
Ms. Hines said we’re not helping those in South
America by trading and that we should protect others. She felt that
the resolution would do more harm than good. We should protect our
interests
Ms. Webb said that fast food would save us. We
should be isolationists! And of course, my favorite, “Monorail,
monorail, monorail!”
That resolution failed 4-17
Ms. Webb then presented a resolution dealing
with the touchy subject of AIDS and how it is growing at an
exponential rate and that it is a worldwide problem, including here
in the US. She said that Georgia should test women for AIDS so
State of GA should
require AIDS testing of all sexually active women and if they test
positive, they should be sterilized. Res sub Mary Webb
Ms. Copley said that would cause some women to
avoid pre natal testing and that not everyone wants to be tested
Mr. Lewis said it was evil and that this
testing discriminates against women and he denies that AIDS is a
problem and that it is something over funded in the US. He also has
an affinity for homosexuals.
Ms. Aaron says that there are plenty of ways
to avoid AIDS and that telling mothers about the costs will deter
them further from getting help.
Mr. Grosse as usual said that this resolution
doesn’t go far enough.
Mr. Gallagher said that the resolution was
barbaric and that we should just stop.
It failed 2-19 and Mr. Lerner says he was kept
from speaking by a small and belligerent minority
J.
Ms. Parker then stood and said she recently
took her GRE and that we suffer from an absence of choice which is a
circumstance. There is no free choice. Somewhere there is a
difference in choice and will which I don’t understand at all. But
maybe that’s just me. Anyways….
BIR Free choice is an illusion
Mr. Lewis said that the children are the
future. I nearly threw my pen at him. Everything is decided based
on what you know and that if you have a choice, it’s a free choice.
Mrs. Copley said that if there is no free
choice, there is no responsibility….WAHOO!!!!
Mr. Lerner said that he wants his decisions to
have consequences and that he wants others to influence him. We all
interact because of choice.
Mr. Addison said that norms, values and beliefs
about life are set into motion by education. I have some words in
my minutes at this point that I will kindly skip over.
That resolution, too, failed 4-11
Ms. Aaron got up and said something about
clothing and how we can never have too much of it. I laugh in your
general direction!
We did eventually adjourn after Ms. Winchell’s
thorough critics report, although I might have just made all that
up. |
University of Georgia 