Health/Science

High opinion of one's own efforts can have negative consequences

06:05 PM CST on Sunday, March 7, 2004

By SUSAN GAIDOS / Special Contributor to The Dallas Morning News

Forget about self-esteem. You might be better off if you focus on your weaknesses.

Researchers are challenging the popular view that high self-esteem is a panacea for personal and social well-being. After extolling the virtue of high self-esteem for decades, psychologists have now found a downside to holding a high opinion of yourself.

Self-applauding efforts may cause people to act in ways that are downright self-defeating, undermining their ability to learn and achieve their goals, some research suggests.

And a review of scientific studies shows that having high self-esteem may make you feel good about yourself, but it clearly doesn't have that effect on others.

"The bottom line is, we don't necessarily love people who love themselves," says Kathleen Vohs, a psychologist at the University of British Columbia. "In fact, we don't like them any more than low self-esteem persons, but they think we do. And in situations where they feel threatened, high self-esteem people are liked significantly less."

The new findings have implications for school programs and therapeutic efforts aimed at bolstering self-esteem in children and adults, says Roy Baumeister, a psychology professor at Florida State University.

"We're zeroing in on what the advantages of self-esteem are, and sadly, what they're not," Dr. Baumeister told attendees at the annual American Association for the Advancement of Science conference last month in Seattle.

A study of sixth-graders, for example, found that the effort to maintain a high image of themselves could squelch students' curiosity and make them shy away from challenges that might bring failure. Other studies with schoolchildren suggest that kids with high self-esteem are more likely to experiment with early sexual activity and drinking.

What's more, says Dr. Baumeister, high self-esteem comprises a mixed bag of traits and, therefore, includes not only people who have an accurate appreciation of their good qualities but also narcissistic, defensive and violent individuals.

"People with high self-esteem are quite different from one another, and there are several different patterns," Dr. Baumeister says. "I think the next generation of research will try to break self-esteem apart and look at some of the subcategories to understand how they behave differently."

Self-esteem is defined by how much value people place on themselves, and is often based on self-judgments about one's abilities and attributes – it's perception rather than reality, he says.

"It refers to a person's belief about whether he or she is intelligent and attractive, for example, and it does not necessarily say anything about whether the person actually is intelligent and attractive."

Dr. Baumeister says self-esteem was often touted as a solution for personal and social ills in the 1970s, "somewhat in advance of scientific information to back it up."

Since that time, researchers have identified some benefits to having high self-esteem. For example, those who regard themselves highly claim to be happier and show more initiative than do those with moderate or low self-esteem. These benefits can boost their confidence to act on their own decisions or strike up new friendships, Dr. Baumeister says.

Admiring yourself also makes you feel good, he adds, and provides a stock of positive feelings that can buoy you through life's daily trials.

"That you love yourself is nice, and this stock of positive feelings can make day-to-day life more pleasant, and comes in handy under adverse circumstances and problems," Dr. Baumeister says. People who lack these resources may be more vulnerable to stress and depression, he adds. But apart from boosting feelings of happiness and resilience, high self-esteem brings no real tangible benefits to those who fancy themselves, research shows.

One problem with many of the early reports on the benefits of high self-esteem is that they relied solely on self-reported benefits, Dr. Baumeister says.

Last year, he directed a scientific review of thousands of studies on self-esteem, poring over data on more than 18,000 subjects.

The findings were published in the journal Psychological Science in the Public Interest.

"We decided early on that we were going to restrict our survey to studying objective measures because you can't always trust what people say about themselves," Dr. Baumeister says.

The scientific studies confirmed his suspicions, revealing that people who hold themselves in high regard often exaggerate their good qualities. While people in this group claim to be more likable, intelligent and attractive, the findings contradict these perceptions.

For example, one study examined how interpersonal skills relate to self-esteem. People with high self-esteem gave themselves high marks for their abilities to get along with others, show support to partners and manage conflicts. Researchers then surveyed the respondents' roommates and got another view, showing the self-admirers didn't rate any higher than average.

Similar discrepancies were found when subjects rated themselves on intelligence and attractiveness. In one study, students with high self-esteem claimed to be smarter than others. Researchers then compared the students' self-reports to their IQ scores and grades. In fact, those who claimed to be smarter than others often scored lower on these objective measures.

When asked to rate themselves on their attractiveness, those with high self-esteem again revealed their vanity, rating themselves higher than did students with low-to-moderate self-esteem. A panel of judges reviewed and rated photos of all the study participants and found no relationship between self-esteem and attractiveness.

"Basically, people with high self-esteem look the same as everybody else, but they say they're much more attractive," Dr. Baumeister says.

Although such self-puffery may seem harmless, some studies show that efforts to paint a positive image of yourself can change the way others see you, as well.

Dr. Vohs found that when responding to negative feedback, those with higher self-esteem often use interpersonal exchanges to bolster their feelings of self-competence. Everyday events – such as an embarrassment, criticism or having their authority questioned – may cause these people to become defensive and seek reassurance from others that they have performed well. By contrast, those with lower self-esteem were more likely to solicit suggestions from colleagues and work to shore up their relationships.

When petitioning others for a pick-me-up, the high self-esteemers are often viewed as antagonistic, rude or unfriendly, Dr. Vohs says. In such instances, they were rated less likable than their cohorts with less esteem.

"The goal of high self-esteem people is to make themselves feel better, and they're very good at doing that," Dr. Vohs says. Unfortunately, they sometimes use interpersonal exchanges to bolster their self-esteem, and inadvertently turn off their relationship partners, she adds.

Jennifer Crocker, a professor of psychology at the University of Michigan, says people often chase after self-esteem to prove they're worthy human beings, but in the process may end up creating the opposite of what they really want.

That's because those with high self-esteem often place a disproportionate focus on themselves and their performance, she says.

"We grow up in a family and community and culture that tells us, if you are X, then you will be wonderful and successful and bad things won't happen to you," Dr. Crocker says. For each person, this X, or area of contingency, may differ. For example, some people place their value on their appearance, while others assess their self-worth based on their intelligence, wealth or creativity.

Chasing after self-esteem in this way can take an emotional toll, giving you a boost when you succeed and causing misery when you fail, Dr. Crocker adds.

"It's those increases and decreases around our typical level that have a lot of emotional power and wallop, and we can live our lives in the attempt to get the boost and avoid the drops."

Dr. Crocker says people can change their focus by setting goals that benefit both themselves and others. For example, when giving a presentation, you might focus on a goal to learn rather than a desire to prove your intelligence.

"You can imagine giving a talk and looking at the questions you get – even hostile questions – as being great feedback and an opportunity to stretch your thinking and better understand what it is that people have difficulty with," she says.

Approaching self-esteem in this manner would create a more stable sense of self-worth, Dr. Crocker says.

Michael Kernis, a psychology professor at the University of Georgia who has studied stability as a factor of self-esteem for almost 20 years, agrees. He says many researchers in the field are beginning to recognize that self-esteem is multilayered, and a number of factors are at play when people evaluate their self-worth.

These variables explain why a group of high self-esteemers can include both the most violent and least violent people, Dr. Kernis says.

Stability in self-esteem can help keep people grounded, making it less likely for them to be swayed by everyday conquests and hassles, Dr. Kernis says. People with unstable self-esteem are more easily affected by daily events, causing them to feel better or worse about themselves on an ever-changing basis. Also, those with a more fragile sense of self-esteem don't like to admit their weaknesses, and are quick to anger, more defensive and often engage in self-promoting activities.

Dr. Kernis found that fathers played a major role in helping children establish stability in their self-esteem. Kids with unstable self-esteem were likely to report that their father nagged them, called them names or insulted them when he was angry.

"These fathers were psychologically controlling, and less likely to acknowledge ... the good things their kids did or offer validation," Dr. Kernis says. "They didn't offer verbal encouragement or physical affection, and things like spending time with them when they did well."

He says that by looking at different components of self-esteem, researchers may better be able to improve the well-being of children and adults.

"People have become a little disillusioned with the kinds of findings that have emerged in the self-esteem literature and with the so-called self-esteem movement," Dr. Kernis says. "We're at a point now where it makes sense to focus on aspects of self-esteem other than its level."

Susan Gaidos is a free-lance writer in Maine.